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What You Need To Know When Dating Someone With Borderline Personality Disorder

Hi Rick, I was hoping to gain a little more insight of some issues I’ve been experiencing with my girlfriend here of late. I’ve been reading about what you have said about BPD and some of it seems to be making sense with my case, but I was wanting to hear some opinions from someone like yourself. So my story begins with this beautiful girl I met online. At first we just did some light talk back and forth, but as time went on we exchanged numbers and began talking about a potential relationship. We talked about our interests and similarities via text and phone conversation for about a week.

There may be times your emotions take over. Someone with BPD will also experience mood swings that could turn into arguments. To avoid making situations worse, listen actively to what your partner is saying and learn to show empathy at the right moment. Being in a relationship with someone who has BPD could be a difficult journey for some.

I am struggling with her wishing she could go back to him, or else hoping to find someone who doesn’t find anything wrong with her (i.e. a guy who barely knows her). She doesn’t have these thoughts when I am doing everything to https://onlinedatingcritic.com/ make her happy. Do I really have to be on my best behavior all the time or risk losing her? Not being afraid to say no can also reduce anxiety and depression symptoms. You don’t have to do anything that makes you uncomfortable.

We discussed therapy but she basically refused and went to a psychic instead. I found myself really liking and admiring him. He would return texts and answer phone calls and even initiated them himself.

Why Do BPD or Bipolar Relationships Fail?

“You have to take evidence, not feelings,” she says. Stopping herself from second-guessing other people’s intentions has allowed her more freedom within the relationship. “We have such a massive capacity for overthinking, to the point where these thoughts appear valid,” she says.

How do people with BPD show affection?

Her eyes, smile, and mannerisms were all different than the woman I fell in love with. They mirror and become what we want and do so with everyone, but the mask only lasts so long. Mine needed just 48 hours and that’s not even the record here. My ex is already dating someone else & I’m honestly blown away by how quickly she moved on. If they’re in treatment, good luck to them.

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Learning about the disorder will help you better comprehend how your loved one feels. Recognizing that your loved one has a completely different emotional perspective will assist you in protecting yourself and adhering to boundaries. People suffering from Borderline Personality Disorder are prone to feelings of jealousy and rage. This inclination arises from their fear of abandonment, which can force them to overreact to any event, no matter how minor. They may want constant confirmation of your love and dedication to them. While this is not true for all BPD patients, many are struggling with the consequences of an abusive and traumatic upbringing.

Dating A Girl With BPD (Borderline Personality Disorder)

” which may only make the situation more reactive. You may find yourself thinking “this is so irrational,” but you can’t calm them down. Dating someone with borderline personality disorder can also sound really serious. Especially if you’ve never heard of a “personality disorder” in general or have any idea what it actually means. Mental health as a whole can be very nerve racking if we don’t have a full understanding of what is really going on. Navabi believes her latest relationship success was partly due to not overthinking it.

I wouldn’t say they changed me, per se, but they were certainly instrumental in me getting better. I hated the way I was acting and didn’t want to lose him, so I worked on bettering myself. The first 3-4 years of our relationship were UGLY. Not only is it survivable, but bpd is highly treatable and it’s symptoms very commonly fade with proper help.

Use of medication and DBT, CBT, schema therapy and some other modalities have proven helpful. Someone with BPD may experience intense anger, depression and anxiety and find it more challenging to return to an emotional baseline. When something bad happens, it can be challenging for someone with BPD to process everyday emotions and bounce back from an emotional setback. Everyone has a threshold for what they’re willing to bear in a relationship, and it’s important to understand yours.